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Week of 6/20/23


“Who Are You Listening To?”

Your parent says, “If you don’t go to college, you won’t get a good job.”

Your coworker says, “Forget that promotion. You don’t have the right experience!”

Your inner voice whispers, “I can’t do this!” “What if I fail?”

There is no shortage of advice from people telling you, “You won’t!” “You can’t!” or “You’ll fail if you try.” You may even use that same language talking to yourself. Let’s examine these closely.

The people giving you negative advice usually fall into one of two categories.

There are those who genuinely care about you and don’t want to see you get hurt. So, they encourage you not to strive for something better. Then, there are those who are afraid that you will succeed, making them look bad. Or, they project their own insecurities on you.

No matter their motivation for giving you advice, these people will feed your self-doubt and steal your joy, keeping you from making the decisions that will open a whole new world of opportunity.

Then there is that negative inner voice that asks, “What if I fail? What will it cost me? Or, “How will my family or friends respond?” If you dwell on the negatives, you almost always ensure negative results.

To defeat these voices of negativism, change your questions. “What will I gain when I succeed?” “What additional opportunities will come when I succeed?” “How will my success help others?” Then, after writing down the pros and cons, make your decision based on facts, not feelings.

Here is a short story…

A young mother who had been excellent at clerical work received an opportunity. The woman who managed a radio station invited her to sell advertising. This was a commission only position. After a serious discussion with her spouse, she decided to take the chance. Almost immediately, the other salespeople told her that she would fail and drop out in less than 3 months. At the end of 2½ years, she was the top performer, passing over those who said she would fail. This young woman had asked herself the “right” questions. Then she threw herself into learning her trade, serving her clients, and being a top producer.

Today’s takeaways. Be careful who you listen to. Make your decisions based on facts, not on feelings. When you decide to make a change, don’t look back and ask, “What if…?”

“Who Are You Listening To?

That is today’s Morning Minute.

To discover how we will help you create the exception leader that you want to become, contact me directly at or 864-630-2625.  Larry Bonorato

Morning Minute 6/23/23 "How Do You Define Success?"


“How Do You Define Success?”

This is a two-part question.,

As a leader intent on creating a winning team, you need to know how each team member defines success. To create your own success, you must define it for yourself.

Let’s examine each.

To understand how a person views success, you ask them, “What does success look like to you?” Be quiet and let them talk. They may never have been asked this question before. To see their real objective, you may need to ask, “And, then what?” several times.

For instance, as you interview Melissa, you ask, “How do you define success?” She answers, “I need a better job.” You ask her to describe a “better” job. She answers, “I need to make more money.” You ask, “And then what?” Melissastates she needs a better car. You ask, “And then what?” She shares that because her car is broken she must borrow her Mom’s car. Her mother also works, so that limits the amount of time Melissa can use Mom’s car to 24 hours per week, only after 3pm each day.

You ask, “After you get a better car, then what?” Melissa shares, “With a better car I can work a full week, earn more money, and be able to help Mom with the bills.”  You ask, “And then what?” She tears up and shares, “Then we can stop fighting over money and me using her car!” Now you know how she defines success. Being independent, feeling good about her job, and regaining a better relationship with her mother. Their definition of success is rarely about money. Keep asking until you find their real objective.

Now, defining your own success requires the same track. You write down that you want to make $12k per month. Ask yourself, “Then what?” You write so that I can pay all my bills on time. “Then what?” So, I can put my kids in private school. “Then what?” So, they will have better friends and learn more. “Then what?” So, we can spend more time together and I can stop being gone 16 hours a day working 2 jobs. “Then what?”  So, I can give them more guidance because I have more time, and we can be happier together as a family.

Bingo! There is your success picture!

Use this process to really determine both your view of success and that of each team member.

“How Do You Define Success?”

That is today’s Morning Minute!